In Foundations of Brain, Behavior and Cognition (FBBC), I learned about the idea of a place cell. There is this group of neurons in the hippocampus that represent location in the mind: perhaps some may fire — and therefore represent — a specific study space, while another group might fire and help us recognize the corner of the cafeteria we're sitting in. As with the rest of the brain, these place cells are intricately connected with other neurons that compute other things, such as sensory processing or word recognition.
I wonder what place cells fire when I think of "home."
During orientation, I remember how my heart sank when my First-Year Mentor talked about going "home" to her apartment. The mere utterance of the word evoked images of high school bonfires at Huntington Beach, family outings to LA's museums and far too many nights spent at Seaside Bakery (guess where I'm from). There were so many other freshmen that I knew who missed home, across the country and the world.
These feelings soon abated as the semester picked up. I swore that I became busy to the point that there was no time to indulge in nostalgia and recall home. And whenever I saw my roommates out in the wild, I said I looked forward to seeing them “back home.” I knew my brain had rewired because of the image of home in my mind's eye: a cozy (dare I say cramped) triple with just enough room to study, live and sleep. This was all perfectly fine until I truly came back home for winter break. I remember telling my parents how excited I was to bring new clothes "home." To wear at Hopkins, I meant. Their smiles seemed less full.
As someone that has lived in the same place their entire life, it was shocking to see the images that "home" now evoked. I saw two conflicting images with every mention. I felt as if my neurons were fighting and changing with every thought. Would I find myself longing for the Maryland snow more often while laying on the beach? Are these feelings the result of missing my family and old friends in Garden Grove, or waiting for a chance to connect with new mentors and supportive classmates?
And I know I wasn't alone in this thinking: some of my friends traveled across the world over the past year. Perhaps they found Philadelphia more of a home than anywhere else during Intersession; perhaps they traveled across the world and found a country more aligned to their idea of home. As cheesy as it sounds, the one thing that unified these "homemaking" stories was the bond they formed with others. Coming to Hopkins challenges the idea that home is a fixed place; instead, it's something that we build through community and by creating a sense of belonging. There are many places and spaces that build upon our backgrounds (cultural clubs, hobby groups and the like) and therefore offer familiarity in this new environment. As someone not familiar with the East Coast, being at Hopkins has been a blessing to explore somewhere so homely yet so far from home.
And as my brain matures and these synaptic connections grow and change, I am excited to find new places where I fit in — to find new people and discover new places where I belong. I can only hope that everyone grounded for most of their lives can find that same peace: the courage to venture out and discover new concepts of home.
Andrew Huynh is a freshman from Garden Grove, Calif. majoring in Neuroscience. His column, “Ad Astra,“ captures his reflections on modern life and Hopkins as he navigates his transition into adulthood.
