The Culture: Kim Kardashian — the Elizabeth Taylor of our day

Kim Kardashian is a bit like Elizabeth Taylor, but without any redeeming qualities. Take away Liz Taylor’s talent, charm, and violet eyes, and you have a Kardashian.

That’s not to say Kim doesn’t have her own appeal — she can boast a voluptuous figure, a sex tape, and her face as the spokesperson of practically every brand in the country. If that’s not success in America, then what is?

Maybe that’s the point: the Kardashians are so American, or they personify negative American stereotypes to the nth degree. For them, everything is big: from the diamonds to the basketball player-sized husbands. Their presence is larger than life, and it loudly fills the cultural void with greed, ambition, opportunism, and materialism.

Clearly, their process works. After all, they’re more successful than most. They have more shows than ever multiplying family members. You can find them in Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Kourtney and Khloé Take Miami, Kim and Kourtney Take New York, or Khloé & Lamar. Yes, you counted right. There are four shows about the Kardashians.

While I’m not a Kardashian fan per say, I confess I’ve seen at least one episode of each of these series. Keeping Up With the Kardashians is probably the best. Because it has, you know, that wholesome family aspect.

If you put the Kardashians in a work of fiction, no one would believe you. That’s why they need reality TV. Because in that shameless world where you market exaggerated personalities no one shines brighter. They seem to have been created for the medium; they are plastic and camera-ready, while at the same time salaciously trashy.

The first time I saw Keeping Up with the Kardashians, I thought this is why people say pretty girls should keep their mouths shut. Because if you only saw a picture of Kim, you’d think, that’s an attractive woman. And you wouldn’t need to consider the matter any further.

But then she opens her plumped-up little mouth and it all goes to hell.

Yet interestingly enough, opening her mouth and her home to America has made her much more money than that face and body alone ever could have. So Kim Kardashian has proved that we’re even more interested in the “real lives” behind the sex appeal. And it’s a happy bonus if these lives are extravagantly tacky.

Nevertheless, the shows are kind of interesting. The Kardashians have a strong (albeit bizarre) family dynamic. And these people all clearly care about each other, which is nice.

Also, their men are some of the funniest human beings I’ve yet to come across. If you think the Kardashian women have white noise behind their raven hair, you can’t even imagine what’s going on in these guys’ heads.

Take Scott Disick, for example. He is Kourtney Kardashian’s ne’er-do-well boyfriend/fiancé and one of the best love-to-hate-them caricatures. In any given episode, you might see him rage around in his boxers and then drunkenly slam his fist into the bathroom mirror. Or you can witness his inspired business ventures, such as his attempt to break into the male tanning market.

But Scott’s finest moment is perhaps his response when Kourtney says, “After this photo-shoot I’ll eat whatever I want.” His reply: “Is my penis on that diet?”

Don’t get me wrong: Scott has been steadily evolving and maturing throughout the years. Kourtney has even made him a chore chart to get him involved around the house (and to his credit, he only whined about it a little bit).

Besides Scott, I like Lamar Odom the best. He is married to Khloé. (And as I understand it, he’s also some kind of sports player? But I never would have heard of him if he wasn’t on the show.)

Lamar is actually very cute. He’s no genius, but he’s sweet. I remember one scene where he talks about how much he enjoys children’s coloring books.

Bruce Jenner — former Olympian and Kardashian father figure — is kind of likable too. He has a sense of humor behind that eerily stretched-out face.

Best of all, we have so much fun judging them. All across the Internet, you’ll find that the public simultaneously loves and hates Kim Kardashian.

We could endlessly discuss whether or not she’s had any plastic surgery. Rhinoplasty! Breast Augmentation! None, leave her alone! There are many opposing viewpoints.

Despite all the sexploitation, I like the Kardashians because they’re a matriarchy.

Feminism may not run the show, but Kris Jenner sure does.

The Kardashian mom has at times been compared to a pimp — she’s very good at pushing her daughters — but her shameless business savvy is rather compelling.

Unfortunately, the height of the Kardashian Empire may be behind us. We’ve already seen Kim’s dream wedding, and it was exactly what we wanted: a short-lived fairy tale and porn.

But I suppose there’s always more scandal. Not too long ago there was speculation about Khloé having a different father than the rest of the girls. I believe the Kardashians righteously dismissed this, but the intrigue remains.

And who can resist it? Because we, like the Kardashians, always need more.