Well, at least we can't accuse Universal Pictures of false advertising. Intolerable Cruelty pretty much lives up to its title, subjecting moviegoers to the cruel experience of paying $8.50 to see an intolerable film.
To be fair, the movie isn't a total flop. I admit to laughing a few times, and some of the supporting cast members deserve recognition for good performances. But, with a star-studded cast and a first-rate director/producer duo, I certainly expected much better.
Written, directed and produced by the Coen brothers, Intolerable Cruelty should have been destined for success. Brothers Joel and Ethan are the team behind critically-acclaimed films The Big Lebowski, Fargo and The Man Who Wasn't There. Their latest film reminds me the most of another of their well-received productions, O Brother, Where Art Thou? Besides the fact that both star George Clooney, they also share a ridiculous amount of improbability.
Cruelty teeters haphazardly between dark comedy and screwball comedy. Viewers who saw the annoying Zellweger/McGregor bore, Down with Love, will notice many similarities -- a cynical view of romance, candy-colored detail, actors vamping for the camera and pretentious flirtations reminiscent of a second rate soap opera.
The Coen brothers tweak the concept by moving the setting from the 1960s to the new millennium (and therefore removing the screwball comedy from its conventional era), employing a bigger-budget cast, and injecting a bit of dark comedy as the two main characters try to eliminate each other. None of these elements do anything to make the film more palatable. In fact, they might be the root of the problem. What worked for Down With Love (which wasn't much) or O Brother might have been that their Coen-style improbability was hokey and dated.
George Clooney stars as Miles Massey, a divorce attorney who always wins, no matter how much evidence might be working against his client. He is also famous as the originator of the Massey pre-nup, an impenetrable agreement that takes the financial risk out of marriage. Despite his success and riches, Massey feels that something important is missing from his life.
Enter Marilyn Rexroth, played by Catherine Zeta-Jones. The soon-to-be ex-wife of a wealthy real estate developer and habitual philanderer, this sexy, man-eating gold-digger finds herself empty-handed thanks to Massey's skillful representation of said philanderer, Rex Rexroth (Edward Herrmann). Not to be outdone, Marilyn schemes to get even and, as part of her plan, quickly marries oil tycoon Howard Doyle (Billy Bob Thornton). Deception and pure sexual attraction escalate between Miles and Marilyn, creating a cynical and cumbersomely ironic romance.
Clooney and Zeta-Jones don't have much more than a modicum of chemistry on screen, and occasionally you'll catch a glimpse of Cary Grant in the handsome star. I couldn't help but grin at the added irony of casting diva Zeta-Jones as the gold-digger. The diva's marriage to Michael Douglas, an millionaire many years her senior has been a gossip column of an institution from the beginning. But what you may not know is that their marriage almost fell through over a battle with the pre-nup. After negotiations, Z-J's price was fixed at $3 million per year of marriage. Oh, l'amour!
One redeeming factor in the film was the handful of notable supporting cast members in very colorful roles. Geoffrey Rush plays Donovan Donaly, a rich man who catches his wife sleeping with the pool repair guy in the opening scene. He helps set the tone for the entire movie, which is either good or bad depending on whether you like the goofy tone he creates.
Cedric the Entertainer, Jonathan Hadary and Irwin Keyes each have particularly memorable roles as well. Cedric plays Gus Petch, a cameraman sleuth whose primary goal in life is to "nail yo' ass" -- Rex Rexroth's in this case. His single-minded approach to his profession is quite amusing. As Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy, Hadary is certainly the most flamboyant, over-the-top character. Heinz helps socialite women find schmuck millionaires to be their sugar daddies and soon-to-be cuckolded husbands. Finally, Keyes steps into the ample shoes of Wheezy Joe, an asthmatic hitman and a victim of the Coens' violent dark comedy ^ la Fargo.
My favorite performance by far was Thornton as Howard Doyle, Marilyn's new fianc??. This Texan oil tycoon with a southern twang and a dull mind more than vaguely resembles a certain president, and his incessant monologues are absolutely hilarious. Paul Adelstein also does a fun turn as Wrigley, Miles' right-hand man who cries at weddings.
Keeping the real talent in the wings, or at least in the supporting roles is very typical of the Coen brothers. The side characters in Intolerable Cruelty are just as talented as John Goodman or Frances McDormand in other CoBorther films.
Basically this film relies heavily on personal taste. The actors offer decent performances, the script has some sharp lines and funny scenarios, and the premise -- while cynical -- has merit. But the cinematic style itself will make or break the film. Some may call it innovative or ironical or clever. I, however, agree with my movie buddy, who described Intolerable Cruelty as "overdone."
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