Dear Yana,
I’m writing to you from my favorite couch in the living room of my four-person apartment that I share with my friends (some of the best friends I’ve ever had). It’s been a harder day than most, and I’ve stumbled more times than I’d like to admit, but I’ve looked after myself and managed to get some work done — and that’s a win in the university handbook.
I won’t say four years flew by because, at times, they certainly felt long. Nights when we’d only wrap up laying out the paper at 4 a.m., and mornings when I’d wake up at 4 a.m. to study for what was always an economics exam — I’ve pushed myself harder and more consistently than ever before. But, in between all of that has been real happiness. Contentment. Pride and gratitude.
Often, midway through a bring-your-own-dinner night with friends, you’ll feel like the luckiest girl alive. After receiving a good grade on a test that you worked really hard for, you’ll recognize the effort you put in rather than attributing it solely to fluke. Though you’ll sometimes feel like you’re moving through the motions, stuck, you’ve gotten better at turning your face up to the sun and breaking out of routine.
You’ve always been better than me at embracing change. But I’m happy to say that I’ve improved. For example, I’m now quite close to being able to say that I’m an outdoors person — at least, I’ve hiked the Maryland Heights Trail in Harpers Ferry, W.Va., which is one more hike than we’d previously (voluntarily) completed. It’s a small example of change, but an important one, to me.
I’m also more willing to try new things: climbing, running, public speaking. It’s the last one that I’m especially proud of, my time at the paper having offered gentle yet firm encouragement. The Editor-in-Chief role is absolutely something you never thought you’d do — thought you could do — and yet, it’s become something that has guided so much of how you now carry yourself: with purpose, quiet self-assurance and perspective. It taught you that leadership could be service, not just authority, and that listening can sometimes be more important than speaking.
We’ve also found new friends, who transform the mundanity of the everyday into magic, with conversation, laughter and connection. All of a sudden, three meals a day became three opportunities to share stories, poke fun and theorize over hypothetical situations — “What would you do if...?” Whether we slow it down to watch television or speed it up to see the world, it means everything.
It’s been four years of all of this. I want you to know that you’re really proud of yourself. Like I said, you’ve grown more confident. More sure of who you are. More in tune with how you’re feeling and less afraid to express it. You’re still working on some things, but that’s okay. There’s time.
That being said, we didn’t do these four years alone. It wouldn’t have been possible. Thank you to our friends, our girlies, who picked us up when we needed it, and who gratefully accepted the same back. Thank you to some incredible teaching and advisory faculty, without whose support we not only wouldn’t have learnt anything but also wouldn’t have felt seen. Thank you to The News-Letter and all its people, old and new. Thank you, mostly, to my parents. For giving me everything. You cheered me on through it all.
Wrapping up our senior year — wrapping up our entire undergraduate experience, in fact — has been really hard. There are lots of expectations and hopes and dreams. But I think I could stand to learn from you and remember how not to be afraid of failure. I am here today because you decided to get on a plane and move halfway across the world. That young, bright-eyed girl has done a lot since then, and sometimes I forget that, for however much I’ve grown, I am still her and she is still me.
So, while I figure it out here, you work on surviving the next four years. Or, rather, thriving — because I know you will. You’ll love it. I know I did.
Love always,
Yana
Yana Mulani is from Dubai, U.A.E. and is graduating with a degree in Economics, English and International Studies. She is a previous Editor-in-Chief, Magazine Editor and News and Features Editor for The News-Letter.
