Five lines that prove K. Dot could fit in at JHU

Maybe my obsession with hip-hop artist Kendrick Lamar, formerly known as K. Dot, has made me delusional, but sometime around my 103rd listen of his platinum album “good kid, m.A.A.d city,” something dawned on me – the reason I could relate to the lyrics so well was because they described the Hopkins experience.

And thus, my newest conspiracy theory was born: somehow, Kendrick Lamar slipped under the radar and received a degree from Hopkins without anyone noticing. Not convinced? Just check out these lyrics and see for yourself:

1. “Nights like this, I’m a knight like this/ Sword in my hand, I fight like this” –“Collard Greens”Sounds like Kendrick Lamar is no stranger to the struggle-filled all-nighter. This line from ScHoolboy Q’s latest hit is all-too reminiscent of hour 1 of a night spent at the library, when your Jitter Machine from the Daily Grind is kicking in and you feel like you can conquer the world, or at least finish your paper in time for your 9 a.m. class.

2. “Sometimes I need to be alone/B***h, don’t kill my vibe, b***h, don’t kill my vibe” –“B***h Don’t Kill My Vibe” Kendrick seems to have experienced something that happens to the best of us: somehow, his entire group of friends finished all their work and he’s stuck with hundreds of pages’ worth of reading. They want to go and party, but that Biochem chapter isn’t going to read itself. The Compton native knows that the best thing for him to do at a time like this is occupy a cubicle on C Level and get in the zone, ignoring his friends’ pleas for him to accompany them to Maxie’s.

3. “Me and my n****s trying to get it, ya bish” –“Money Trees” If “it” means a degree, then we’re right along with you, Kendrick. All the hours we spend in the library and the brain cells we’ve worked over capacity in class are sure to not have been in vain when we walk across the stage, diplomas in tow - and there’s no fun in being successful if your friends aren’t right along with you. So yes, Kendrick. Me and my n****s are trying to get “it," as well.

4. “Hot sauce all in our Top Ramen, ya bish” –“Money Trees” K. Dot must know that, with the price jacks at Char Mar and Levering, times are hard around Homewood, especially for those of us without meal plans. So when life gives you dried noodles from a 2 a.m. Uni Mini run, you just gotta spice them up with some hot sauce and be thankful that you have something to eat at all.

5. “And momma used to say/One day it’s gon’ burn you out” – “The Art of Peer Pressure” Kendrick is clearly familiar with the stress of worrisome parents and guardians. They want us to eat well, take our vitamins and get eight hours of sleep each night, but we want to get Dean’s List-worthy grades - or, in Kendrick Lamar’s case, platinum selling records. Anyone who goes to Hopkins would know that achieving all of that is next to impossible, so our moms end up nagging us. If this line can’t prove to you that K. Dot is one of us, I don’t know what can.