A recent report published in "Angry Dramatists Weekly" has shed light on a distressing problem for all of us that are involved in the art of practicing drama ver??rgert as the Germans call it (this roughly translates to angry, upset, delusional, pickled and full of vibrant and diverse flavors derived from fresh local ingredients - again this is a rough translation, I do not appreciate being constantly bombarded with e-mails and letters criticizing my literal translations.
It is more of an art than a science, translation that happens to be. All of that being said, I think this is at least pretty accurate if indeed not excellently close to being accurate. This report has uncovered evidence that Aristotle's infamous and sometimes ubiquitous Poetics is in fact a farce.
Paul Enojado, reporting for ADW, found only one documented production in which a certain Alex TG found it to be "Pretty trite, really formulaic and only whimsical in its use of bad puns."
As Enojado points out in his article this discovering could entirely change of the course of drama, narrative, film, Emeril Lagassi's career as well as the way in which we watch our printer spool our theses after a long night of drug abuse. Those of you who are not familiar with Aristotle's text (only slight idiots; you all were probably too busy learning to read Greek to actually bother to well ... read Greek) it establishes the foundation for all narrative and storytelling. Its influence is continued to be felt even in Dan Brown's recent The Lost Symbol (a book one can only truly appreciate in the original Turkish).
When we contacted Brown's people for comment he simply responded "acid smells like cheese." Brilliant words from a brilliant mind.
As an extended monologue featuring many somewhat dry characters, Aristotle's mediocre drama does not carry the weight that the aesthetically tyrannical incarnation constantly slammed in artists faces all over the word (for evidence simply look at Picasso's self portrait. Aristotle significantly disfigured him ?- so much so that the litigation has lasted longer than both of their lives.
Supreme Court Justice Scolia could not be reached for comment so I'll attribute a comment to him. "Picasso was Spanish, Aristotle Greek: need I say more?" Also a report in ADW (Angry Democrats Weekly) has recently found that Scolia does not read Greek and is actually an externalized figment of Colin Powell's imagination.
Fascinating, simply fascinating.
While a revival of Aristotle's simply sh--ty farce is slated to open on Broadway, the West End, Off Broadway, Off West, End East, Broadwest, Westway, and the Schubert Theatre - all eight productions feature justice Scolia in the lead role. A many of many skills, just none of them useful - this recently discovered evidence and the words of this Alex TG seem to have undercut most of our fun.
We can no longer make fun of people much more interesting and talented than us that make good art but that doesn't fit inside a very strange and arbitrary cookie cutter that we like to enforce because we can read Greek. Today truly is a sad day.
Tickets for The Poetics: a Farce in one very long and somewhat fascistic act are available from Ticketmaster. Bring the Greek speaking kids for free!
