A friend of mine recently asked how to bridge the gap between friends and lovers. I would have loved to give him some fantastic five-step advice to turn his female friend into the love of his life, but there isn't any easy answer. There can't be an easy answer.
Every woman has a different idea of what her ideal mate should be like and wants him to convey this in a different way. For Juliet, Romeo had to whisk her away from her family. For Cinderella, Prince Charming had to find her the perfect shoe. For Juno, Paulie Bleeker just had to, well, be.
The notion of romance has obviously changed from the dawning of fairy tales to the present-day interpretation of romantic comedy. While there is no easy path from female friend to girlfriend, there is a clear-cut method for interpreting whether or not someone is interested in you.
Girls and guys alike can be ambiguous in displaying their true intention when they interact with a potential mate. Anyone who watched VH1's The Pick Up Artist knows that guys have a slew of potential pick-up tricks in their bag.
They may drop a "neg," (an insult meant to display higher value) which, though off-putting, is not meant to turn a girl away. Rather, it is meant to intrigue the girl or cause her to feel the need to prove herself to the guy. Likewise, a girl may accept a drink from a guy she has no intention of sleeping with (shocker, I know, guys).
Despite what men and women may say to each other verbally, there are a few physical clues people drop during conversation that never lie about intention.
Thus, I present to you, the timeless pick-up tricks that have nothing to do with duels or shoe-hunting: the simple body-language tricks. Here's a breakdown by body part:
Eyes
Don't be fooled by the long, piercing gaze. People don't naturally hold eye contact for more than five seconds, so it could be a pick-up trick. If you're looking for a no-strings attached kind of an interaction, go for it. Just don't be surprised when he doesn't call the next morning for breakfast.
Head tilt coupled with eye contact, however, is a strong sign that he's into you. Think of the head tilt as kiss positioning and go for it.
Lifted eyebrows is an indisputable sign that he's into you, but it can happen lightning-fast, so it may not always be easy to spot.
Lips
Smiles are important. Closed-mouth grins means he's kind of into you, but he's going to take his time sharing emotions. Smiles with stretched top lip and peek-a-boo front teeth means he likes the conversation, but probably isn't going to be leaning in for a wet one anytime soon.
A half-smile means he might be interested in a one-time fling, or he might not. His face, and emotions, are both split in two. A one-corner raised smile means he wants to play the game. Be coy if you want him to stay interested (see VH1's The Pick Up Artist for pointers).
Shoulders
If your special someone has his chest and shoulders pointed towards you, it means you are the only one in the room they are interested in.
Hips
If he is paying attention to his crotch, either by hanging in thumbs in his front pockets or scratching, it means he wants you to pay attention to his crotch also. If his pelvis area is merely facing you, especially if his legs are spread apart, it means he wants you.
Toes
Toes together signals self-consciousness. You have the upper hand here. You can encourage to your heart's content, or you can walk away and never look back.
So the next time you're in PJ's or at the Den, pay attention not just to what he or she is saying, but also to what he or she is doing. And maybe don't look for the next love of your life at PJ's or the Den.
