Better name, still the same place - It's helpful to know the substace and scenery behind the words

The News-Letter. Now, what are you thinking? Perhaps low-level incompetent aspirant Features columnists? Perchance that crazy cat Jeff Novichs topic in this week's "Strange Brew"? David Leiman's Thomas Friedman-esque political analyses? Or Shannon Shin's southern charm? Overstepping the boundaries of question mark usage?

Name association can be an amusing activity, as it evokes logic in a way similar to the Rorschach test or more modern pyschodiagnostic examinations. Then again, it has its drawbacks; I still get a tad flustered when someone says, "John Hodgekins, huh? Looks like someone's going to be my doctor some day!" Even worse: "New Jersey, huh? Looks like someone thinks they live in New York City from the other side of the Hudson!"

An explanation is in order. Last week, I learned from The New York Times that elected officials in West Paterson, New Jersey are petitioning to change their town name to Garret Mountain. West Paterson, its residents and leaders feel, invokes association with the crime, chaos and poverty of the larger city neighboring it. On the other hand, they argue Garret Mountain - a proposed title that would connect the city to its natural landscape treasure - makes people think of a bucolic and majestic setting that one might find in certain Bob Ross paintings or Henry James novels.

Despite its rich Revolutionary War-era history and multitude of surviving cityscapes, its true that Paterson is now a land of decadence and diminishing promise. Most of the city resembles Baltimore's North Avenue. It has its treasures, though: a great Salvation Army, a handful of delicious Chinese restaurants, an enchanting waterfall, to name a few.

The West Patersonians, mostly white and affluent, are associating and their shame seems to overstep their common sense. In this case, it seems that this kind of name connotation has become extrapolation and that when it comes down to it, any name is really no more than a formality or a facade. Granted, I'm not going to consider naming my kids Slobodan Pattap or Osama bin Pattap - these are ostensible exceptions - but normally, it's no big deal.

"Sean, are you Irish?"

"No, Russian-Jewish."

"Oh, then why Sean?"

"Why not?" End of story. You want to deconstruct that? Don't bother calling it Americanization or shattered cultural identification it doesn't bother me. I like my name.

It's natural and often unavoidable to associate. But it's damn foolish to stop when the process is completed. It's just as natural to take that extra step and ask, "So what then are you majoring in at John Hodgekins?" (maybe they'll learn that its not even called John Hodgekins!) or "How do you, as a New Jerseyan, then identify with your proximity to New York?" Why the West Paterson delegates refuse to see beyond the mask of name association is beyond me.

I'm trying to avoid sounding disproportionately metaphorical and cheesy, but I can't help it: the treasures of Paterson are not just there. Hopkins is not just a pre-med factory. New Jersey is not a place that solely leeches and emulates. And I am not just a Russian Jew with an Irish name.

That Salvation Army, those Chinese restaurants, the waterfall in Paterson...they exist everywhere. It just takes association, reflection and if necessary, denunciation of initial association to discover them. Garret Mountain is a beauty that's already in West Paterson. People who really care about the town would eventually find that out, even if they kept their rich and traditional but negatively associated name.