By now, it's common knowledge that kids these days are way more grown than we all were a decade ago. The evidence lies in Facebook relationship updates, risqu?? attire, potty mouths, references to sex and drugs, etc. But that still didn't prepare me for my niece, Ahava, and her scolding me this past weekend.
It should be pointed out that she's only nine years old. I feel like some people are going to roll their eyes after that because nowadays, nine doesn't even seem that young. Once again, this shows how much things have changed.
At nine, I was in. . . what was it? Maybe 3rd grade. And I had a nice teacher, Mrs. Dauber. I vividly remember getting yelled at in front of my classmates by my mother because I forgot to do one homework, which literally brought me to tears of embarrassment.
The worst thing my mother could threaten me with was to yell or hit me in front of people. Sunday, my mom called while I was wallowing in self-pity because Spring Break was over. We exchanged pleasantries and then Ahava took the phone. The first thing she says is "Amanda Garcia! Oh my God!" Apart from the fact that she sounded like my 27-year-old sister, I was instantly put on edge.
I hate it when any of my nieces call me by my first name; it's like calling your mom by her first name, disrespectful. Right when I was going to correct her, she immediately said, "I miss you so much." Come on, I would have been the ultimate crackerjack if I corrected her then.
She went on to tell me about her classes and how she's gotten threes and fours (equal to Bs and As), except for a single one (D) because she wore her fancy boots when she wasn't supposed to. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that this one is a little fashionista- anything with sequins or feathers she needs to try on.
She then proceeded to regurgitate prices of the most recent toys that my sister and her fianc?? bought for her and her siblings. In my head, I was confused; Why is this girl keeping tabs on how much everything costs?
I would say thank you and keep it moving. Then I rethought that and realized that I also keep tabs when I go shopping with my parents, in order to make sure that my little monster of a brother isn't being favored. It's not that I point it out, but the data is stored for future reference.
Then she accused me of not being true to my word and said that I haven't picked her up from school ever since I started college. I tried to explain to her that I have school during the week, but she wouldn't have it. Now imagine how long I was on the phone with her, and I haven't even told you the half of it.
When it comes to any younger family member, give them as much advice as you can because before you know it, they'll tell you that your mother got them a new black dress and is going to glue a piece of blonde hair on their head for their next YouTube video.