Three NCAA All-Conference Honors players will lead the men's basketball team to the NCAA tournament this weekend. Seniors T.J. Valerio, Danny Nawrocki and Matt Griffin admit that much of their success is due to rigorous practice, a strong coaching staff, and personal drive.
After four years, however, the three wise athletes are ready to reveal some of their magical gifts to the Hopkins student body. The following information has been culled from interviews the three have given about one another. Truth is to be assumed at the reader's own discretion.
The trio starts with No. 5, guard T.J. Valerio. Some points you may recognize: 17 against Haverford on Sunday, 326 this season, and most impressive when they come three at a time. Some points you may not know about Valerio: 1600 on his SAT (twice). And true, he did sweep the Centennial Conference Honors Award over the weekend, but that pales in comparison to the glowing 1994 piece of Agrocrag he shows off to the ladies.
About his accomplishments- the Global Guts championship, as well as his All-Conference Honors, he says, "It felt great, like a lot of my hard work was recognized." Specifically in terms of this past weekend, he adds, "All of us cared more about a championship and team honors this year a lot more than any individual accolades."
Not only is his vocabulary as superb as his game ("Accolade": Ceremonial bestowal of knighthood), but he's also sired an entire baseball team ("Sire": title placed before a name and denoting knighthood). Between collecting a variety of vocabulary words and conquering the Agrocrag, he's managed to play a little basketball. And by play a little basketball, I mean average 12.3 points per game, collect 86 rebounds this season and walk off the court Saturday with an All-Conference medal for the second time in his career. This king of the court, though, is quick to acknowledge his comrades.
"There are a number on our team who are of All-Conference caliber," he says, "and that's why we ended up winning the championship."
"Caliber": degree of merit or excellence; quality. Perhaps the name Danny Nawrocki comes to mind? With 15 rebounds and 10 points against Haverford on Sunday, most would agree he fits Valerio's description. If that doesn't impress you, maybe the fact that this June he'll be playing in the 2007 European Cup for Poland's national team will. What's the secret behind this international athlete's success? Some of his skill may come from his special water bottle he uses before games. With this magical water bottle, Nawrocki could take his game to the universal rather than international level.
"He's kind of like Michael Jordan in Space Jam," Valerio says. This hypothesis is supported by information suggesting Nawrocki may be more than just human. To be specific, he has inhaled a seagull. Were you aware that most gulls, if not taking live food, will "scavenge opportunistically?" Nawrocki must have inhaled plenty of seagulls -- he's scavenged a record-breaking 291 rebounds. Gulls are also generally carnivorous birds. Nawrocki, accordingly, is craving more than just a win, as Hopkins hosts the NCAA's first and second round games. "We are really hoping that tons of fans show up this weekend, fully armed with slices of roast beef to wave in the air."
The roast beef shall wave proudly when the third member of this trio of terror hits the court. Matt Griffin, powered by a significant amount of cottage cheese, has scored in the double figures in all but three games this season. This season, he leads the team in points and is ranked third in the conference for scoring. Though he does have impressive biceps, Griffin's performance is just as mental as it is physical. He consistently uses his Buddhist mind tricks on his opponents, brainwashing competitors 23 times this season as he assisted the Blue Jays to 23 wins. He averaged 16.5 points per game over the weekend, and also took home his second Centennial Conference medal. He accredits this success to a "much better focus than years past" -- to be specific, a British accent that he's developed to confuse opponents.
The thoughtful senior, though, isn't one to dwell on the past. The accomplishments of the weekend "might be nice to look back on, but we're still playing. There's not a lot of use in thinking about it now." Some accomplishments he does have to time to think about, however, are "flocks of groupies and other gifts from boosters" -- two of his favorite aspects of Hopkins basketball. When asked about the highlight of his career at Hopkins, he prophesies: "I'll tell you in a couple of weeks."
Though the three may have different pre-game rituals and court strategies, they all agree that this weekend is the time to unite their powers. "This is what we've been waiting for four years," Griffin says. Valerio adds, "It's a great experience and we are all going to enjoy it. We know if we play like we did on Friday then we have a great chance to move on."
The team will challenge Villa Julie College this Friday. They shall stomp (an art frequently practiced by the team) into a Goldfarb Gymnasium full of waving roast beef and flocks of groupies, fully charged with powerful Agrocrag rays, standardized test mastery, advanced vocabulary, British accents, cottage cheese and seagull nutrients, Buddhist mind tricks, and a special water bottle.<?p>
