Dr. Ruth chats with the News-Letter

News-Letter Opinions Editor, Francesca Hansen, sat down with Dr. Ruth Westheimer on Tuesday to ask her about her past and her current views on America.

Francesca Hansen: You mentioned some mothers having "Victorian-Puritan values." What values did you have instilled in you as a young teenager?

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: Very good point, because I lost my parents when I was ten. But I do remember that before I was sent to Switzerland, I remember my mother and grandfather sat me down and wanted to talk to me about menstruation. They were so embarrassed, but I told them I knew already. Later, I went and crawled up on a shelf that was locked with a key and took out a book on sex ...

FH: At a young age you went to Israel to fight with the Haganah ...

RW: I was a sniper. But that was not an act of heroism, I was 17 at the time. We were part of some kind of movement to defend Israel. I never killed anybody, but I can still put five bullets into the red circle. Watch out, journalists. But I was badly wounded and that's not shrapnel. But that's not why I'm short, I would've been short anyway.

FH: Any lessons you take with you from the experience?

RW: I'm very much a believer that every person in this world needs a country of their own. And all I want is peace.

FH: Are you still involved with Israel?

RW: I go to Israel every single year. But not for politics, but to show my loyalty. And to show that I stand up to be counted, because I believe that every person needs a home-country.

FH: You talked about the sexual progress of every country. A few years ago, Jocelyn Elders was appointed to be surgeon general under Clinton, and was fired ostensibly because she mentioned teaching masturbation for sexual education in schools.

RW: That was a very sad episode ... But I don't think that's why she was fired. I will say this country is more sexually literate now, but not enough.

FH: You said, "Abortion must remain legal." Within the current administration there has been a scaling back of abortion rights

RW: I'm very sad. Because I do believe that this is not political football. This is something that concerns the couple: Him, who got her pregnant because of a contraceptive failure, [and] her because of an unwanted pregnancy. I want every child to be a wanted child. I'm very sad that anybody uses this as a discussion on television -- you'll never see me discuss it ... It should be outlawed to use it in politics.

FH: But do you ever discuss it?

RW: I try very much to stay out of politics. That's why I can go to Washington to talk about sexual literacy, I can go to Notre Dame University to talk about sexual literacy, I can talk to Mormons, I can go to a university in Salt Lake City -- I say, "What I am politically is different." Everybody, right or left, has to know about sexual issues.

FH: Do you ever use religion to help relate sexual issues to couples?

RW: I wrote a book called Heavenly Sex : Sexuality and the Jewish tradition. I show that in the Jewish tradition there is nothing that cannot be done or discussed with both partners, not against their wishes.

FH: You have built your career upon being sexually honest. In the United States, have you ever experienced a negative response that surprised you?

RW: There was one time in Kansas City, some guy who wanted to be in the limelight -- he said I cannot talk about homosexuality on a college campus because it was a state university, it was state property ...

I really have never had any real problems in all of those years. And I started to work for Planned Parenthood many years ago. I started a radio show in 1981 ... I talked explicitly, but I didn't do it in order to arouse ... Even people who disagree with me, they let me do my thing.

FH: How did you decide to become a sex therapist?

RW: I didn't decide to do it, they decided for me. They gave me the opportunity to do the radio program. I said, "Look what I can do, all over Canada, all over the United States, every Sunday night for two hours."

FH: Any advice to 18- to 21-year-old college kids?

RW: I would say never to engage in sex without really being in love, without having a relationship, and without contraception.

If you've decided to abstain, stick to it. Don't let anybody talk you into it. If you do want to be sexually active, don't do it just if you're drunk. Don't do it just because somebody said you ought to do it, do it when you make that decision.