You've met twenty possible dates in one night, but you've only talked to each one for six minutes a time. Maybe you've spent the whole night blindfolded and have only been able to use your ears to choose a date. Or maybe you haven't been able to talk at all, and are only able to express yourself by writing on pieces of paper. Welcome to the modern dating world.
Speed dating is a phenomenon that is slowly spreading around the United States. Currently it is largely successful in New York City and California. Some popular companies include Hurry Date, Eight Minute Dating and New York Easy Date.
"These programs are for the busy and beleaguered," explains Daniel Bonallack, owner of New York Easy Date.
Bonallack is a banker by day and speed date facilitator by night. He opened up New York Easy Date with a friend of his whom had been actively involved in Jewish speed dating.
"She decided that she [was] sick of meeting orthodox Jewish men and needed variety, so we decided to open up a service to everyone," states Bonallack.
New York Easy Date operates like any other speed dating service. It consists of about twenty males and twenty females in a room. These forty singles are then assigned to tables. After six minutes, Bonallack rings a bell and the rotation occurs.
"For the first half the men rotate while the women stay seated, then after half time, the men remain seated and the women rotate," explains Bonallack. "At the end of each "date' everyone marks down the person they just spoke with and checks either the "yes' or "no' column next to the name."
"Most things discussed in the six minutes include where you live, career, your hobbies," says Bonallack. "Although we find that the men who engage in more flirty banter tend to get chosen by the women."
The speed dating takes place in the back of the bar to make the atmosphere more relaxing. "Originally most start out a bit uptight and then as the evening goes on [people] become more excited, [as] the couple of drinks in the beginning tend to kick in," says Bonallack.
Many people leave successfully paired up with a match. In the event that both parties marked "yes" they are then eligible to receive the other person's e-mail address only. This is a perk of speed dating because you are never obliged to give your phone number.
"Men especially like it because they can be at a bar hitting on a woman and not get the typical female eye roll to her friends signaling "oh great some guy is hitting on me,'" states Bonallack.
While speed dating isn't quite the phenomenon at Hopkins that it is in New York, one can't help but wonder what would happen if it caught on at Homewood.
"Six minutes is not an adequate amount of time to meet a stranger," comments junior Jesse Fulton. "You need at least a month to see if it's a good fit."
And even if time isn't an issue, some students think that selection is.
"Hopkins is small enough that if there was someone I was already interested in I would have met them most likely," says junior Blake Caldwell.
"We don't need speed dating here," says freshman Melissa Matarese. "You can get that in Terrace by stopping at someone's table for six minutes."
"I think it would be fun, comments sophmore Debbie Sondak "... If it were limited to Jewish med students."
While the idea of speed dating on the JHU campus doesn't seem overwhelmingly popular, Internet dating has proved successful for some.
Freshman Chris Watful and Danielle Haber think the Internet is a great way to meet students. Originally they were not interested in looking for love at first byte. In fact, they developed a friendship online the summer before school. After finally meeting in person at Hopkins they decided to date a few weeks later.
"An advisor had sent out some advice on course selection to a long list of freshman. Then someone took the list and turned into a large chat room," Haber explains. "At first many of the kids seemed sketchy, but then I met a few great people, including, Chris."
"It is a bit awkward at first because you don't actually know who you are talking to, but at the same time it is a convenient way to get to know people on campus," states Watful.
Popular Internet dating sites include Match.com, Singles.com, Jdate.com (for Jewish singles) and CollegeDate.com. CollegeDate.com is growing in popularity. Many students post a profile. A typical profile includes: college, identifying name, photo, age, height, hair, eye color and race. A quote is also included to entice prospective dates. These "pick up" lines range in quality from Casanova to drunk guy at party. Samples include:
"Bear" from Texas A&M University: "I am a junior molecular cell biology major. I am not looking for a serious relationship, either friends with benefits or a big girl for a threesome."
"Frank" from University of California, San Diego: "I am an engineering major and love to smile and laugh. I am honest and barely tell lies, I am mostly very composed, but lately have been a bit more outspoken."
Speed dating and Internet dating are alternate ways of finding that special someone. Many feel it is bizarre and that the people who need to resort to such practices are "sketchy" or desperate. For some it is a convenient way to meet others if you have an especially busy schedule.
Speed dating and Internet dating, while the most popular forms of alternative dating are not the only ones. Slowly rising in interest are "silent dating", "blind dating" and "remote dating."
Silent dating involves a similar setup to speed dating. The one exception is talking is not allowed. Couples communicate with cards. The advertisement for silent dating explains, "Now enter the world of tranquility, where singles flirt and lose inhibitions through the art of silence. Your tools for the evening only include a pen and paper."
Basically couples write down questions to one another and judge the other person through body language. Silent dating is considered to be the "curious eroticism of text." Originating in New York City, this phenomenon is starting to spread.
The idea of communication through writing is supposed to slow things down. It decreases the over excitement caused when meeting someone new and prolongs sexual tension.
"Blind dating," also a New York City invention, involves many singles in a dark room. Couples are put together in a specific part of the room and just speak. You are to make your decision based on hearing another person's voice.
"We would never expand to blind dating because people are way too superficial, but I think remote dating is a good idea," comments Bonallack.
Remote dating involves meeting people through the use of video cameras. Basically people gather in a "remote lounge" and are divided by sixteen booths. Each individual booth is equipped with a television screen and a rotating camera. The person in booth sixteen can choose on the screen in front of him to point his camera at booth six. If the person at booth six is cute the person in booth sixteen can then call up booth six, through a phone provided in the booth, similar to jail.
Of course there is always the good old traditional ways of dating. Being set up by a friend, meeting someone at a bar, or just confronting that crush. Will Hopkins take part in this new wave of dating? Probably not. Many on the campus seem to be consumed with work and not really interested in making that extra effort to find someone.
"It's funny," explains senior Emily Mayer. "When you are actively looking for someone, you won't find anyone, [but] the second you stop looking you are swarmed with opportunities."
"It's true -- [the complications of dating] all go out the window as soon as you meet the right person," adds senior Sam Permutt, Mayer's boyfriend of almost a year. The couple met in the library. Go figure.
