Published by the Students of Johns Hopkins since 1896
April 25, 2024

10. "Quick to the point, to the point no fakin'/ Cooking MC's like a pound of bacon"- "Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice

The talented Mr. Ice uses a simile here that would have even the worst IFP student's shaking their heads.

9. "New Kids on the Block had a bunch of hits/ Chinese food makes me sick" - "Summer Girls" by L.F.O.

While rhyming can be used to enhance a song, L.F.O. just uses it to prove a basic mastery of the English language.

8. "Someone left the cake out in the rain/ I don't think I can take it/ Because it took so long to bake it/ And I'll never have that recipe again" - "MacArthur Park" by Richard Harris

Generally, singing about baked goods and demanding to be a respected songwriter is not a good idea.

7. "If I was a boy/ I'd turn off my phone/ Tell everyone it's broken" - "If I Was a Boy" by Beyonce

It is unclear whether Ms. Knowles (a.k.a. Sasha Fierce) truly believes that is the greatest gender inequality.

6.'"Did I forget to mention/ I need to get her over to my crib/ And do that night thang/ 'Cause Im in love with a stripper"- "I'm 'N Love (Wit a Stripper)" by T-Pain

This is poignant songrwiting at its best.

5. "He was a boy/ She was a girl/ Can I make it any more obvious?" - "Sk8er Boi" by Avril Lavigne

When L.F.O was learning about rhyming, Avril was learning about the proper use of nouns and verbs in simple sentences.

4. "You will never live it down/ Unless you whip it/ No one gets away/ Until they whip it" - "Whip it" by Devo

The phrase "whip it" has never been said more than in this song andm, quite possibly, will never be said that much again (unless, of course, the '80s make a comeback).

3."I'm dead (you're done), that's it for me/ I'm gonna be picked off the family tree" - "Aaron's Party (Come get It)" by Aaron Carter

A pre-teen boy whose brother was in a '90s boy band shouldn't be expected to be the next Cole Porter.

2. "All of the boys and all of the girls are begging to if you seek Amy" - "If You Seek Amy" by Britney Spears

As clever as it sounds when she sings it, that sentence does not make sense in any way.

1. "So let 'em know your name/ There's no limitations on imagination/ Imaginate" - "Imaginate" by Hannah Montana

While this may not be the crowning glory of this sensation's worst lyrics, it does get bonus points for using a non-existent word.


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