Usually, the dream comes and goes but stays long enough. It’s me and my mom walking from my grandma’s house under a colorful night sky. I can see the stars in the dream. I just need to look up and they are the only thing illuminating the night street. When I wake up, a sudden heavy wave of nostalgia washes over me. This is a memory my mind loves to replay when I am sleeping or daydreaming. Interesting enough, it is the first memory of my childhood, as far back my mind can take me. The beautiful part is, it was my birthday. Of all the memories to engrave into my consciousness, my mind chose that one. Lately, this memory has become a part of me, comforting me as it drifts in and out of thoughts.
Time has flown. I am a month away from reaching a milestone someone might say. Turning 21 soon, do I feel any different? Yes, I do. As the date approaches, I decided to walk a memory lane and reminisce about the experiences that have shaped the person I am today.
Timeline 1: Bravery of a five-year-old
The first day of preschool. I definitely cried. I didn’t want my mom to leave me there, and looking back, it was the first time I had ever been separated from her. But I decided to be brave. I dried my tears and continued my day. I met incredible tiny little humans who were my first friends. After that I decided I have a passion for learning and made a promise to myself to continue to learn and educate myself. Proud of my five-year-old self. You did exceptional!
Timeline 2: Embracing the unfamiliar
Moving to America. Suddenly, the words “new” and "unfamiliar" became the foundation of my vocabulary and my everyday life. This move meant seeing my dad for the first time in person. When I hugged my dad, I felt a tidal wave of emotions hit me. Uniting with someone I had only ever known through phone calls and FaceTime, having him physically in front of me was a new start for my family.
When I started school, some kids were incredibly kind, and others were not the best. I cried again, of course. I wanted to leave. But just like in preschool, my determination won, and I stayed. Eventually, I made friends, learned a new language, and got used to my new life. However, puberty happens (which definitely wasn’t fun), I moved to New Jersey (which was super fun) and finally, I landed in Maryland.
Timeline 3: Heartbreak, euphoria and all the in-between
Maryland has been my home for five years now. It’s where I met my best friend. We were both new to the state and met in Biology class. Thank you Dr. I, to whom I am still grateful for bringing us together. I grew to truly love this place. Maryland has witnessed my heartbreaks, happiness, grief and now adulthood. It has seen me through many chapters, yet something still feels the same.
I could never forget the people and experiences that defined this era. It impacted who I am, but most importantly, it showed me who decided to stay in my life. I have felt raw and vulnerable, grieving people I have lost, meeting new people, starting college. And through it all, I lived to tell the tale.
The milestone doesn’t stop
Time doesn’t stop even if there have been days where I wished it would. Some of us lose ourselves as we transition through the stages of life. We become different people. We drift apart, and in a blink of an eye, the people who once knew the sound of our laughter became familiar strangers. It is a mystery of existence how lives can intertwine deeply, only to quietly slip away into the background of our past.
To 21: I wish for you to surprise me in this new chapter. And to you dear reader: I wish for you to reach a milestone as well. I want everything life has to give even the hard days because without them, I wouldn't know how to appreciate what I have. Let’s all remember, growing is not bound to numbers. Everyday is a fresh milestone in the making. Here’s to the next one!
Alexandra Garcia Herrera is a sophomore from Laurel, Md. majoring in Chemistry. Her column, “Letter from a Freshman,” explores her reflections on what happens outside the syllabus: friendships, identity, grief and growth.
