Published by the Students of Johns Hopkins since 1896
October 5, 2022

An Open Letter to Mitt Romney

July 8, 2012

Dear Mitt,

Let’s throw out political ideologies for a moment. Let’s pretend that you and I both have the same visions for the country (we pretty much have opposite visions for the country). Let’s not talk about politics at all, actually.  If we were to meet in real life, we could sit down and have some good, wet lemonade and those chocolate goodies or whatever they’re called. Oh yeah, doughnuts. Especially if they’re from 7/11.

While we’re enjoying our local treats, let’s talk about why I, even if I were a staunch conservative, would still not want you to be my President for reasons that have nothing to do with your platform. Let’s start with what you did this week. I have no problem with you jet skiing, or taking a vacation. I want my Presidents to be able to take vacations. But what I have a problem with is what you do on your vacations. Romney Olympics.

First of all, the fact that this vacation is mandatory throws me off a little bit. Vacations should not be mandatory. They should be spontaneous and involve some tanning and book reading. If I were in your family, I would not want to be subjected to competing and playing sports for a week. I would also not appreciate you changing up the rules so you could win. I would especially not appreciate this if I was the family member who had just had a baby who you feel so threatened by. Are women not allowed to be better than you at sports? Is that why you added nail hammering?

During all of this competing, your family is forced to take a picture together. Everybody is wearing matching outfits while you and Ann proudly sit in the middle. It’s kind of cute. Unless you are one of the people wearing the matching clothes. As someone who was forced to wear matching outfits ordered straight from some catalogue with her brothers as a child, those pictures make me cringe.  It kind of makes me think that you want to organize America in the same way. When you are forced to dress the same way as everyone else, you lose your individuality. Each family member looks like they are only there to make you and Ann look good. That is not the kind of freedom that I want in America. It only reminds me of your plan to run this country like a corporation with the goal to make profits for yourself. Sorry. That was the liberal in me surfacing. The conservative with the same values as you might say that forcing everyone to wear the same clothes is socialism, etc.

Most importantly, let’s talk about your attitude in general. This week, Obama was hanging out with people in Ohio and Pennsylvania. He even made one speech after having a few beers. His sleeves were rolled up, he was right at home with the people and he looked like he was having fun. You never really look like you’re having fun. It makes sense because you aren’t really a people person. It’s hard when you haven’t had to interact with people who aren’t from your business world.  If I was sitting down with Obama right now and he was trying to win my vote, he would probably offer me a beer so we could have a relaxing chat. You wouldn’t, because you’re running for office, for Pete’s sake.

So if we’re ever going to meet, or if you want to win the youth vote, which is essential to you winning the election, you should try to chill out a little bit. Next time, go on a vacation where you do absolutely nothing. And if you can’t relax, then I don’t think you’re ever going to actually connect with the American people.



-Rachel Witkin, Editor-in-Chief

Comments powered by Disqus

Please note All comments are eligible for publication in The News-Letter.

News-Letter Special Editions